I am a patient person when it comes to most things; however, when it comes to healing, not so much. I injured my back on August 10th which was 11 days ago (when I wrote this). I know progress must be occurring but there are days where I feel like I’m at a stalemate. For instance, yesterday I was able to get up and go for a long walk with my partner in a wetlands area. The weather was absolutely beautiful and it seemed the farther I walked the looser my back became. This was the first time since the injury that walking felt good. According to google maps we did about 6 miles at a very leisurely pace and I felt really good after (though obviously the back and knee were quite tired). During a walk today though I felt quite a crick in my back so only did about a mile or so. Progress can feel so slow.
If there’s one thing I really want to hold on to throughout this experience, it’s the awareness that mobility freedom can be taken away at any moment. It’s really quite incredibly hard to actually fathom that one could lose their ability to move, but times of injury are definitely good moments to reflect on your priorities. I’m working on that. I’m also working on having some perspective. I am incredibly lucky to be in a place where I am able to take a time out, focus on healing, and graciously accept the help I’m being given by loved ones. There are people in this world that don’t have anyone to look after them or that simply cannot afford to look after themselves. So when I’m getting some serious cabin fever I try and think all about the perspective.
Putting perspective aside there’s only so much one can do when they need to lay down for a majority of every day. I’ve injured my back many times before unfortunately, but I think this time has been the worst due to the circumstances. Going from being 1 week into your 3 week hike, having an absolute blast after planning the hike for ages, to being bedridden is a quick shot of contrast. All day every day we were just moving and seeing beautiful things:
Then all of a sudden I can’t do much more than lay down. Well, it certainly called for some creativity to amuse myself. Sometimes I torture myself by watching hiking videos on youtube. When I’m feeling less masochistic I’ll try and do some writing or research some things I’ve been interested in for awhile. It’s even gotten to the point where my partner’s pulled out his old Nintendo 64 and we’ve binge played Mario Kart into obsession. Generally I read a lot which I’m looking forward to getting back into, but I’ve got to lay low for a bit after returning a book to the library a few weeks late. I just need to try not to be so eager for my back to heal and take things a day at a time.